Sunday, June 18, 2006
Being a long time since I have posted...
As I had stated, I do not have enough time and energy to post frequently. Or more correctly, I am lack of the movation to do so. Every blogger has his/her own objective of of blogging. Mine is to reflect on the life of this guy named teamilk aka the duck, which seems to be myself. I do not know why, but recently the only thing that is happening in my life is... nothing. It is like a vast emptiness, as if africa plain stretching so far that I am unable to see the horizon. Everything is static in it, like a fading brown scene caught frozen inside of the frame of an old camera. The air is still, not a single weed move, the silence within it is so deafening that it almost drives me mad. Only the sky keep changing, from day to dust, but always cloudy. It is the only indication of time, the only thing that is moving within it. I keep walking towards the distant horizon, but never closing the distance in between. I am desperate to get out from this piece of land, longing for the sight of a new lush, green and bright land infront of me. But I was afraid to run, afraid to be wore down by the humidity and dryness of the environment, afraid of the dimness and the tall weeds will block my view of any traps lying in wait of me. I knew that if I fell, it will be utterly impossible for me to regain my balance again. So I proceed warily, one step at a time, without rest, without food nor water. With every breath I take, sandpaper rubs against my throat and lungs. How I long for the waterhole in that lush piece of land at the other side of the horizon line. Could I make it in time? Could I reach there before I bent in to the force of gravity, falling down and lost forever in the sea of the still weeds? Could I summon the wave of strength, the solid sense of energy which will propel me out of the frame and to the other side of the horizon? I do not know...
The only thing that I am aware now is I am lost helplessly in this plain. It is like a nightmare haunting me, closing me down. Only thing is, it is
real.
"oh give me a home where the buffalo roamswhere the deer and the antelope playwhen seldom is heard. a discouraging wordand the skies are not cloudy all dayhome, home on the range......"
it is just sooner or later
11:06 AM
